DBT Diaries – Week 14

*PLEASE REMEMBER NOT ALL GROUPS ARE RUN THE SAME WAY AND YOUR EXPERIENCES MAY BE DIFFERENT TO MINE. THERE IS NO RIGHT OR WRONG AS EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT, THIS IS JUST MEANT AS A LITTLE INSIGHT INTO THE TOPIC FOR THOSE WHO ARE INTERESTED.

TOPIC

This week’s topic was continuing the emotion regulation module. It covered identifying values and priorities and accumulating positive emotions in the long-term to build a life worth living. Something that might be relevant to everyone – not just those with BPD.

Accumulating Positive Emotions Long-Term

The idea of accumulating long-term positive emotions is to make changes in your life so that positive events will occur in the future leading you closer to the life you want to be living. Sounds great right?

  1. Start now to do something every day that will help you build the life you want to live – not sure what that is?
  2. Ask what values are really important in your life – e.g. having stable, loving relationships, being part of a group, living a life of pleasure and satisfaction
  3. Identify one value to work on now – what do you need or want to work on in your life immediately?
  4. Ask what specific goals you can work on that will make your value a part of your life – e.g. working on current relationships or ending destructive ones
  5. Do pros and cons to determine the best goal to work on now
  6. Identify small actions you can take to achieve your goal – e.g. set aside quality time to spend with loved ones, ask about their day
  7. Take one action step now

THOUGHTS

As with the problem-solving skills taught last week, it’s deceptively simple and can be applied to a variety of areas in life. What is truly lovely about this skill though is that by slowly changing something small each day and each week one day you will wake up and realise you’re living the life you want to.

I’ve been feeling quite lonely recently so I used this skill to reach out and create new friendships and have people I can share my interests with. I’ve been doing it for about two weeks now and I have increased the number of friends I talk to and have started to cultivate new friendships. It’s something I have been trying to do since I moved to York and ended up befriending the people G spoke to as he is more outgoing than me and I thought that would just be how it was, but actually, I am able to generate friendships as an adult which has increased my mood.

If you have any questions or would like a list of values to help you get started drop me a comment and I’ll get back to you.

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